14.080
वैशम्पायन उवाच॥
Vaiśampāyana said.
तथा विलप्योपरता भर्तुः पादौ प्रगृह्य सा। उपविष्टाभवद्देवी सोच्छ्वासं पुत्रमीक्षती ॥१४-८०-१॥
Thus, having ceased lamenting, she grasped her husband's feet, and the lady sat down, sighing, looking at her son. (14-80-1)
ततः सञ्ज्ञां पुनर्लब्ध्वा स राजा बभ्रुवाहनः। मातरं तामथालोक्य रणभूमावथाब्रवीत् ॥१४-८०-२॥
Then, regaining consciousness, King Babhruvāhana looked at his mother on the battlefield and spoke to her. (14-80-2)
इतो दुःखतरं किं नु यन्मे माता सुखैधिता। भूमौ निपतितं वीरमनुशेते मृतं पतिम् ॥१४-८०-३॥
Is there anything more sorrowful than this, that my mother, longing for happiness, lies down beside her dead husband, the fallen hero, on the ground? (14-80-3)
निहन्तारं रणेऽरीणां सर्वशस्त्रभृतां वरम्। मया विनिहतं सङ्ख्ये प्रेक्षते दुर्मरं बत ॥१४-८०-४॥
Alas! The destroyer of enemies in battle, the foremost among all wielders of weapons, whom I have slain in combat, he beholds—so hard to kill. (14-80-4)
अहोऽस्या हृदयं देव्या दृढं यन्न विदीर्यते। व्यूढोरस्कं महाबाहुं प्रेक्षन्त्या निहतं पतिम् ॥१४-८०-५॥
Alas! How firm is the heart of this queen, that it is not torn as she beholds her broad-chested, mighty-armed husband lying slain. (14-80-5)
दुर्मरं पुरुषेणेह मन्ये ह्यध्वन्यनागते। यत्र नाहं न मे माता विप्रयुज्येत जीवितात् ॥१४-८०-६॥
I think that, for a man here, it will be truly hard to endure the journey ahead, where neither I nor my mother would be parted from life. (14-80-6)
अहो धिक्कुरुवीरस्य ह्युरःस्थं काञ्चनं भुवि। व्यपविद्धं हतस्येह मया पुत्रेण पश्यत ॥१४-८०-७॥
Ah, shame! See here the gold that was on the chest of the slain Kuru hero, indeed, cast aside on the ground by my son and me. (14-80-7)
भो भो पश्यत मे वीरं पितरं ब्राह्मणा भुवि। शयानं वीरशयने मया पुत्रेण पातितम् ॥१४-८०-८॥
O O, Brāhmaṇas, behold my heroic father fallen on the earth, lying on a warrior’s bed, slain by me, his own son. (14-80-8)
ब्राह्मणाः कुरुमुख्यस्य प्रयुक्ता हयसारिणः। कुर्वन्तु शान्तिकां त्वद्य रणे योऽयं मया हतः ॥१४-८०-९॥
Let the Brāhmaṇas and the charioteers appointed by the chief of the Kurus perform peace-rites today for this one who has been killed by me in battle. (14-80-9)
व्यादिशन्तु च किं विप्राः प्रायश्चित्तमिहाद्य मे। सुनृशंसस्य पापस्य पितृहन्तू रणाजिरे ॥१४-८०-१०॥
Let the Brāhmaṇas here today prescribe what expiation there is for me, a perpetrator of the heinous sin of killing a father on the battlefield. (14-80-10)
दुश्चरा द्वादश समा हत्वा पितरमद्य वै। ममेह सुनृशंसस्य संवीतस्यास्य चर्मणा ॥१४-८०-११॥
After having endured the unbearable twelve years and slain my father today, here I am, with the skin of this cruel one who is thus covered, now belonging to me. (14-80-11)
शिरःकपाले चास्यैव भुञ्जतः पितुरद्य मे। प्रायश्चित्तं हि नास्त्यन्यद्धत्वाद्य पितरं मम ॥१४-८०-१२॥
Today, as I eat from the skull of my own father, there is indeed no other atonement for me, having killed my father. (14-80-12)
पश्य नागोत्तमसुते भर्तारं निहतं मया। कृतं प्रियं मया तेऽद्य निहत्य समरेऽर्जुनम् ॥१४-८०-१३॥
See, O son of the best of Nāgas, your husband has been slain by me. I have done what is dear to you today by killing Arjuna in battle. (14-80-13)
सोऽहमप्यद्य यास्यामि गतिं पितृनिषेविताम्। न शक्नोम्यात्मनात्मानमहं धारयितुं शुभे ॥१४-८०-१४॥
I too, today, shall go along the path attended by the forefathers. I am not able by myself to uphold my own self, O auspicious one. (14-80-14)
सा त्वं मयि मृते मातस्तथा गाण्डीवधन्वनि। भव प्रीतिमती देवि सत्येनात्मानमालभे ॥१४-८०-१५॥
O mother, if I die, you — who are the very goddess — should show affection equally to the wielder of the Gāṇḍīva bow. Truly, by this truth, I pledge myself. (14-80-15)
इत्युक्त्वा स तदा राजा दुःखशोकसमाहतः। उपस्पृश्य महाराज दुःखाद्वचनमब्रवीत् ॥१४-८०-१६॥
Having thus spoken, the king, overcome by sorrow and grief, purified himself and, O great king, spoke these words out of his grief. (14-80-16)
शृण्वन्तु सर्वभूतानि स्थावराणि चराणि च। त्वं च मातर्यथा सत्यं ब्रवीमि भुजगोत्तमे ॥१४-८०-१७॥
Let all beings, both immobile and mobile, listen; you too, O mother, I speak the truth just as it is, O best of serpents. (14-80-17)
यदि नोत्तिष्ठति जयः पिता मे भरतर्षभः। अस्मिन्नेव रणोद्देशे शोषयिष्ये कलेवरम् ॥१४-८०-१८॥
If my father Jaya, best among the Bharatas, does not rise in this very battlefield, I shall destroy my body here. (14-80-18)
न हि मे पितरं हत्वा निष्कृतिर्विद्यते क्वचित्। नरकं प्रतिपत्स्यामि ध्रुवं गुरुवधार्दितः ॥१४-८०-१९॥
Indeed, there is no redemption for me anywhere if I kill my father; surely, afflicted by the slaying of my teacher, I shall attain hell. (14-80-19)
वीरं हि क्षत्रियं हत्वा गोशतेन प्रमुच्यते। पितरं तु निहत्यैवं दुस्तरा निष्कृतिर्मया ॥१४-८०-२०॥
For killing a heroic kṣatriya, one is indeed freed by offering a hundred cows; but for killing my father in this way, the atonement is extremely difficult for me to accomplish. (14-80-20)
एष ह्येको महातेजाः पाण्डुपुत्रो धनञ्जयः। पिता च मम धर्मात्मा तस्य मे निष्कृतिः कुतः ॥१४-८०-२१॥
This Dhanañjaya, son of Pāṇḍu, alone is indeed of great brilliance. My father too was a righteous soul; how can I atone to him? (14-80-21)
इत्येवमुक्त्वा नृपते धनञ्जयसुतो नृपः। उपस्पृश्याभवत्तूष्णीं प्रायोपेतो महामतिः ॥१४-८०-२२॥
Having said this, O king, the son of Dhanañjaya, the king of great wisdom, performed the rite of touching water, became silent, and, undertaking a fast unto death, remained so. (14-80-22)
